The antidote to sadness isn’t happiness, it’s joy; it’s finding a way to celebrate the wins amongst the losses and embracing the sunshine amongst the storms. It’s a way to appreciate all the good this world has to offer, even though it’s much easier to focus on the bad. I want to explore the ways in which we can find joy even when things feel really dark, and separately, I want to briefly explain why it’s natural for us to see the bad.

My teacher, Ted taught me that as hunters and gatherers if we didn’t see the bad coming—if we weren’t on constant alert and lookout—we would get eaten, so it’s our natural inclination to see the bad. In order to see the good, to find joy in the everyday, we need to work against our very nature and purposefully seek it out.

I’m reminded of the poem The Guest House by Rumi, a 13th century poet. Here it is:

This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they are a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight. The dark thought, the sham, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in. Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.

My personal interpretation based on this reading of how to achieve joy in life, is by offering kindness, which I believe is universally accepted as a good thing. First, offer kindness to yourself, allow yourself permission to laugh at the challenges, to be kind even to the negative in your life. In turn, this will allow the positive to shine through, and you never know, you may be able to see the negative in a more positive light. Second, offer kindness to others. Be gentle, give them the benefit of the doubt, the gift of a smile, and show interest and pay attention. Always be willing to lend a helping hand, even if they wouldn’t do the same for you.

Kindness conditions us to appreciate the good, therefore it’s truly never a bad thing.

This week, let’s seek to be kind. Offer that smile. Be gentle. Offer yourself and others love and good wishes.
Accountability, Community, Unconditional Love

Asher

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