To me, love is the most powerful of all emotions. Love can be dangerous and love can be beautiful– yet love alone isn’t always enough. So often when my children are in pain–whether from a medical procedure that must be done, or from schoolwork that feels overwhelming– I want to allow them to stop, to give up, so neither I nor them feel pain and therefore feel unloved.
I had an experience this week where a friend was in pain. He was begging me to help, and technically I would have been able to; I could have picked him up and gotten him out of pain immediately. That would have assuaged my guilt and soothed his immediate pain, yet in reality it would have prolonged his pain for a very long time.
Yesterday, once he was doing so much better, he thanked me for not picking him up. In that instance, me loving him meant not pulling him out of his pain.
Justice without love is harsh, and love without justice is unfair– or so it will seem to the less-loved.
When we play favorites and we love one more than the other– even if we truly love them both– very often, the less-loved feels hated, and doesn’t feel any love at all.
That’s why justice is so important, in that it creates balance. Yet justice without love is unkind because it’s black and white. Love is what creates the balance that reminds us we aren’t the judge, we aren’t in charge, and we are just here to do our best– to be kind, yet not foolish.
If someone is coming to harm us and we react only with love and allow them to hurt us, that is unjust and foolish and ultimately unloving, as we are the custodians of our bodies and souls, and we deserve so much better.
Ultimately, I believe that balance creates purpose. Balance allows for true serenity, and the ability to create and live by a moral code.
What are your thoughts? What does love mean to you? Finally, how do you find balance and show people the love that they need and deserve?
This week, let’s be balanced with our love, and let’s refrain from doing what feels good in the moment if it will ultimately hurt us.
Accountability, Community, Unconditional Love
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