How do we show up in different areas of our lives?
I have a podcast called ‘Showing Up’, and while it’s clear to me how to show up for myself and in the world most of the time, I don’t always know how to show up for a friend.
The world can be a very dark place. There are countless horrible things going on every day, and people don’t see eye-to-eye on virtually anything– even when the end goals are the same. Yet I know it’s not my job to fix the world. It’s way more than I’m able or capable of doing, and so my job is just to show up and make the world a better place in any way I can. My job is to help people help themselves, to be charitable, to speak up for those in need, and to be kind and acknowledge all those I come in contact with.
On an individual basis, sometimes it’s really difficult to know how to show up. Personally, I’m a fixer, and so I hate to see people suffering. However, many times I’m helpless– there simply isn’t anything I can do to help the situation. I want to show up for the other person, yet I don’t want to burden them by asking how I can show up for them. Additionally–and this is tough– even if I know their behaviors are destructive, I must embrace that I’m not there to fix their problems, I’m there to help them when they are ready to help themselves.
I’m reminded of my friend who was really sick. When his friends would come to visit, they told him that everything was going to be okay, to which he responded, “how do you know”? Maybe it won’t all be okay, and maybe the best way to show up is to not give false hope.
Most people say everything is going to be okay to assuage their fears and their pain, and for lack of anything to say that feels more meaningful. These statements have nothing to do with the person they are visiting or trying to comfort.
What I have decided to do is let people know that I’m with them– that from my experience it’s better to go through anything with someone else, rather than alone. Furthermore, I have been asking, “how can I show up for you”? Lastly, I try to be vulnerable, and say, “I want to make it better for you and I don’t know how, so please share with me how I can do that for you”.
How do you show up for yourself and others? Furthermore, how do others show up for you in a way that it is meaningful?
This week, let’s just offer a smile and a lending hand. Let’s show up in the ways we can, and we let’s do our best not to make any false promises.
Accountability, Community, Unconditional Love
I want to remind all of you that you can hear more on my podcast, Showing Up. We have lots of amazing shows with interesting guests on a variety of personal development topics. It would be great if you could also rate 5 stars, review and subscribe to the show. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/showing-up-with-asher-gottesman/id1489856285y